Tasting The "Goods"

At what point in the dating chronology does one talk about sex?

I was on date #4 with "The Russian." He was extremely intelligent, had a great job, outgoing personality, and was super hot to boot. He even had a funky foreign name. How cool is that?
I invited him over to my place for dinner that I had painstakenly prepared. He showed up with a bouquet of roses. Very sweet. Stimulating conversation paired nicely with the salmon I had made and the white wine that he brought with him.

Talking about sex is always a toughie. The subject had not come up because we had not spent much alone time together. All other dates were around town and not conducive to having "the talk."

We decided to take advantage of the last of the summer heat and went for a romantic stroll outside. We kissed, held hands, grinned at each other and chatted along the way. If there is anything I learned from that night, it was to have "the talk" early on, and not in the midst of a romantic embrace. This was my mistake. Not establishing the boundry early made for an awkward break when the heat turned up. I understand that in today's environment, asking a guy to wait until marriage to have full access to your body is a lot to ask--especially since its given out so freely by so many women.

(Beat) "I would like to wait." (until marriage, I added in my head.) "Yes, waiting is good," he replied in his adorably cute accent. "But I have to taste the goods first before I get married."
Taste the goods??? How romantic! Regardless of how cute his accent was, I didn't think it was romantic in any language.

Despite the nice evening, I felt deflated the next morning. I really liked this guy and our sex talk made me question what I was doing. I had heard derivetives like this from guys before, such as "I have to take her out for a test drive." (Since when did I become a car? Something to be ridden and brought back to the used car lot?)

Is there a guy out there that is going to be willing to honor me by making me his wife before "tasting the goods?" Doubt swam around and around in my head. Yes, there is. It's just rare. Just as someone like me is willing to wait, there HAS TO BE a man out there willing to wait for the perfect time for that level of intimacy.

It's not about being a tease or holding out until "I get what I want," namely marriage. It's all about being honored as a woman who is worth the wait, and a man whole is willing to protect me emotionally, physically and spiritually. Intimacy outside of what God intended messes up my spiritual relationship with God. I feel shame. That has to be a lot of responsibilty and what guy wants that on his plate? We gals need a guy who is going to protect us, and many times it ends up being protection from the guy themselves.

I think the best meals are the ones most anticipated...